Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
My liver & The little girl
So I got the new testresults for my liver back, they had gone down abit but not toally, wich is an ease.. Now I just need to figure out why Ive gained so much weight, I belive most of it is water but Im not sure.
I read the newspaper today, about a little girl who were kept out on the balcony a whole night last autumn as if that wasnt enough, her father has several times beaten her up and then put salt and pepper in her wounds with the excuse that it would make it heal better.
In the article it says nothing about her mother, just that the girl has told teachers about what was going on..
Where is the mother in this case?
The only excuse for her not stopping this is if she is diseased, right?
Makes me so sad, the girl is only ten years old and this is the picture she gets about how you raise children?
I hope that she will be able to see as an adult that her father was wrong.
I read the newspaper today, about a little girl who were kept out on the balcony a whole night last autumn as if that wasnt enough, her father has several times beaten her up and then put salt and pepper in her wounds with the excuse that it would make it heal better.
In the article it says nothing about her mother, just that the girl has told teachers about what was going on..
Where is the mother in this case?
The only excuse for her not stopping this is if she is diseased, right?
Makes me so sad, the girl is only ten years old and this is the picture she gets about how you raise children?
I hope that she will be able to see as an adult that her father was wrong.
Friday, December 23, 2011
The kids that never really got to be children..
I meet young people alot, for example by training them in soccer, and one thing I`ve come across alot recently is kids around the age of 12 that is constantly babysitting their siblings.
They miss out on the spearetime with friends, or any sport they wannt to participate in.
There is seldom only one sibling to look after but atleast 2-3.
I know you are now sitting there thinking so what? Of course they should help their parents out?
And yes, you are right - They should.
But maybe not every single night? And is it a good thing they have to clean all of their house, cook for the family aswell?
And here is something else I`ve noticed, this happends while the parents are at home! Yeah you heard me the parents are at home but often takes no responsibility for the smaller kids, instead the older sibling has turned into a non-paid nanny.
The Kids doing this dont see it as a bad thing, they want to help their parents out at any cost, and they love their parents so its not there I see the problem.
The parents are tired from a long day at work, or whatever they have been doing, I understand that aswell.
My problem is; if we leave kids around that age to raise younger children, who is the adult one? Who will teach the younger ones right from wrong?
We can easily find studies that tells us that a 12 year old has not finished developing his/hers own personality or even the brain for that sake.
Yet we leave the ones we love the most alone in a situation that in the long run easily can end in disaster.
Some of you might say now "But hey, cut them some slack, they cant do it any other way they need to support their families".
Oh yes I agree they do need to make a living but how about the goverments? This is ok with them aswell at the same time they wonder why kids brings guns to school?
I remember being 12 years old, Karate Kid was sooo great.. Fighting movies was the bomb! Everyone wanted to be Bruce Lee.. we all loved him!
If you know think of a 12 year old today.. What does he/She like to watch? And since he or she is the one raising his/hers siblings.. What will they learn?
A 12 year old definatly knows some things, for example that the stronger, meaner one often gets what he or she wants in life at the moment. So how will they raise their siblings? They spend the most amount of awake-time with the younger ones and also are often their heroes..
Take a minute - Think about it!
They miss out on the spearetime with friends, or any sport they wannt to participate in.
There is seldom only one sibling to look after but atleast 2-3.
I know you are now sitting there thinking so what? Of course they should help their parents out?
And yes, you are right - They should.
But maybe not every single night? And is it a good thing they have to clean all of their house, cook for the family aswell?
And here is something else I`ve noticed, this happends while the parents are at home! Yeah you heard me the parents are at home but often takes no responsibility for the smaller kids, instead the older sibling has turned into a non-paid nanny.
The Kids doing this dont see it as a bad thing, they want to help their parents out at any cost, and they love their parents so its not there I see the problem.
The parents are tired from a long day at work, or whatever they have been doing, I understand that aswell.
My problem is; if we leave kids around that age to raise younger children, who is the adult one? Who will teach the younger ones right from wrong?
We can easily find studies that tells us that a 12 year old has not finished developing his/hers own personality or even the brain for that sake.
Yet we leave the ones we love the most alone in a situation that in the long run easily can end in disaster.
Some of you might say now "But hey, cut them some slack, they cant do it any other way they need to support their families".
Oh yes I agree they do need to make a living but how about the goverments? This is ok with them aswell at the same time they wonder why kids brings guns to school?
I remember being 12 years old, Karate Kid was sooo great.. Fighting movies was the bomb! Everyone wanted to be Bruce Lee.. we all loved him!
If you know think of a 12 year old today.. What does he/She like to watch? And since he or she is the one raising his/hers siblings.. What will they learn?
A 12 year old definatly knows some things, for example that the stronger, meaner one often gets what he or she wants in life at the moment. So how will they raise their siblings? They spend the most amount of awake-time with the younger ones and also are often their heroes..
Take a minute - Think about it!
Friday, December 16, 2011
Parenting
This parentingthing really bugs me.
I see people around me that always, always put their kids first they really dotn care if they get their own meds and so on as long as the kids has clothes and whatever they might need at the moment. I cant say how much I like those parents.
But then we have another category of parents that seemsto belive that just because they left a relationship they dont have to put their kids first, suddenly they have a new family to care about. The kids from before? Well they suddenly seem to be non-existing and this makes me absolutely furious! Whenever I come across kids with such parents I do my best to show them that I care, I try to always make sure that their needs are fullfilled as best as I can but there is one thing I can never be, and that is their father or mother. Only one person can take that role, their true parent of whatever gender that might be.
I can be a good rolemodel ofcourse but not more then that.
I just dont get it.. You one day seem to be thebest father/mother in the world and then all over sudden you aint a parent at all, the kids can wait, they aint going nowhere are they?
The truth is they cant wait, you were never meant to put them aside, not even for a second unless it was in their best interest (such as if the parent is a addict of some kind etc.) .
Their days will keep passing by, they will see other kids parents pick their kids up at kindergarden, they will hear other kids brag about how strong their fathers are, how good their mothers cooking tastes and so on. And you refuse them the possibility of bragging the same way. You refuse them the opportunity to tell you in the evening how their day was, you refuse them the opportunity to share their deepest secrets with you. Why? I can only see one reason, and that is selfishness.
Then we have one more category of parents I hate, the ones that uses kids as a weapon to get to the other parent. Kids lifes aint supposed to be a battlefield where mom or dad wants to get at the other parent with all costs, you have no right, whatsoever, to backtalk the other parent in front of your child, non! I know sometimes its hard to keep quiet but think about it for a second, once you must have had some sort of good feeling for the other parent, right?
So if you backtalk that person doesnt that only show that you were a moron to create a new life with that exact person?
Did your child say to you: Him/her I want as a parent"?
The answer to that question should be a no if natures law still exist.
Let your kid love the other parent, its in the best interest of the kid I promise!
Also we have the parents that keep their child away from the other parent, the kid has no chance of choosing on its own but you feel like you have the right to? Nuh-uh.. I got news for you, as long as you cant show that it is in any way dangerous for the kid to be around its other parent you are wrong, DEADWRONG!
Once again, you need to understand that keeping a child away from the other parent does not only hurt the other parent but your kid is the one hurting most, often with life-long scars in its soul and you have no right of causing that, then you are the iresponsible parent that never should have become a parent from the start. You are the one hurting your child, not the other parent.
Take a minute -. Think about it, are you really a good parent?
I see people around me that always, always put their kids first they really dotn care if they get their own meds and so on as long as the kids has clothes and whatever they might need at the moment. I cant say how much I like those parents.
But then we have another category of parents that seemsto belive that just because they left a relationship they dont have to put their kids first, suddenly they have a new family to care about. The kids from before? Well they suddenly seem to be non-existing and this makes me absolutely furious! Whenever I come across kids with such parents I do my best to show them that I care, I try to always make sure that their needs are fullfilled as best as I can but there is one thing I can never be, and that is their father or mother. Only one person can take that role, their true parent of whatever gender that might be.
I can be a good rolemodel ofcourse but not more then that.
I just dont get it.. You one day seem to be thebest father/mother in the world and then all over sudden you aint a parent at all, the kids can wait, they aint going nowhere are they?
The truth is they cant wait, you were never meant to put them aside, not even for a second unless it was in their best interest (such as if the parent is a addict of some kind etc.) .
Their days will keep passing by, they will see other kids parents pick their kids up at kindergarden, they will hear other kids brag about how strong their fathers are, how good their mothers cooking tastes and so on. And you refuse them the possibility of bragging the same way. You refuse them the opportunity to tell you in the evening how their day was, you refuse them the opportunity to share their deepest secrets with you. Why? I can only see one reason, and that is selfishness.
Then we have one more category of parents I hate, the ones that uses kids as a weapon to get to the other parent. Kids lifes aint supposed to be a battlefield where mom or dad wants to get at the other parent with all costs, you have no right, whatsoever, to backtalk the other parent in front of your child, non! I know sometimes its hard to keep quiet but think about it for a second, once you must have had some sort of good feeling for the other parent, right?
So if you backtalk that person doesnt that only show that you were a moron to create a new life with that exact person?
Did your child say to you: Him/her I want as a parent"?
The answer to that question should be a no if natures law still exist.
Let your kid love the other parent, its in the best interest of the kid I promise!
Also we have the parents that keep their child away from the other parent, the kid has no chance of choosing on its own but you feel like you have the right to? Nuh-uh.. I got news for you, as long as you cant show that it is in any way dangerous for the kid to be around its other parent you are wrong, DEADWRONG!
Once again, you need to understand that keeping a child away from the other parent does not only hurt the other parent but your kid is the one hurting most, often with life-long scars in its soul and you have no right of causing that, then you are the iresponsible parent that never should have become a parent from the start. You are the one hurting your child, not the other parent.
Take a minute -. Think about it, are you really a good parent?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
About Me
- Sara
- Hejsan! En glad tjej med många, många åsikter. Skriver om allt mellan himmel och jord som kan tänkas dyka upp under dagen!